Dating someone with spinal muscular atrophy
"There is nothing inherently wrong with his question, but if I saw two young people having a nice meal together, I would probably assume they were dating.
This does not seem to be the assumption people make when you throw a wheelchair into the picture.
Burcaw, who needs full-time help and has been in a wheelchair since was three years old, knows full well that SMA will eventually kill him - although, as he says in an online video, "I'm not going to go down without a hell of a fight".
That fight has manifested itself in a fierce sense of humour, and Burcaw has dedicated the last few years to laughing in the face of his illness.
I met a guy last week through my university course and think he is very cute. The thing is I cannot tell if he finds me attractive but is shy to say, or if he likes me but in a friendship way only.
I would really like to ask him out but I do not want to scare him off.
In between sips of his Miller Genuine Draft, Steve asked Kayla the regular get-to-know-you first date questions. He says he wanted to sway Kayla’s perception of him, but nothing charmed her.
For a good chunk of my young life (I'm 22 and I have a disease called spinal muscular atrophy, similar to Lou Gehrig's disease), I didn't think I was worthy of that type of affection. This truth seems to directly oppose all the work I've been doing with my blog, my book and nonprofit. Sure, I can't hold Anna's hand in the traditional sense, but we make it work. And no, I can't go mountain climbing with her, but I can make her laugh. I'm still young and sometimes stupid, so I don't want to trick you into thinking I have this all figured out.
I worried that my physical limitations would prevent girls from wanting to date me. To be fair, our fingers look like a catastrophic train wreck once they are intertwined in the precise position that I can manage. But I believe the deeper closeness in an able/disabled relationship blossoms from the process of teaching your partner how to "care" for you.
As for dating, it’s a minefield of challenges: Before worrying about what to say or what to wear on a date, Steve—like many people with disabilities—feels he has to convince a woman that he’s a human being too (see: Kayla).
He must convince them, he says, that his physical disability doesn’t negate his ability or desire to date and have sex—not such an easy task considering the challenges.